Tuesday, 1 June 2010

The surprise kiss: fact or fiction?

You know exactly what I’m talking about. It’s rampant in Hollywood, and isn’t even confined to Nicholas Sparks’ romantic tragedies. Attractive protagonist A decides, after days, months, or even years of yearning, to suddenly and unexpectedly kiss protagonist B. SURPRISE!!! Yes, my friends, this post serves to discover whether the surprise kiss exists in real life, or whether it is only a figment of every female (and/or male)’s infatuation.

I thought about pretending I hadn’t imagined myself surprise kissing someone. But then I realized that if 93% of Hollywood’s producers are building it into their films, I can’t be alone in my wishful kissing, can I? Someone back me up here.

So I wonder, what makes the s.k. so alluring? Obvious answers include attraction, suspense, best friends turned lovers, etc. but I think a bigger part of it is the 'fascination with the abomination.' Simply put, it is the weirdness in me that is so curious exactly WHAT would happen if I, say…did a running leap through the library, that I have to physically hold myself back from doing it. What would be the aftermath of the s.k.? The sheer potential awkwardness is sickeningly captivating. (Now is the point where you stop reading my blog because I’m insane. No hard feelings.)

Something else I wonder--which would you rather be, the kisser or the kissee? Here are a few case studies of my favorites and/or recent watches.

Possibly the most INFAMOUS of the surprise kisses. Mutually instigated. Result of some serious sexual tension.

The copy kiss. Instigated by her. Result of her liking him (sometimes).

(Don't ask me where the google got this picture, but i recently watched 27 dresses so it was on my mind.)

The bar kiss. Instigated by him. Result of drunkenness allowing him to finally confess his love.

I can’t decide if it’s more a man’s fascination or a woman’s. Experience leaves me torn. On one hand you have those lazy guys who are like, “yeah! girls should totally be forward!” and on the other those traditional ones who won’t ask you out but say, “no way, if a guy likes a girl he'll do something about it.” Maybe that didn't relate. Maybe it was a bitter tangent...ha.

I think the time I came closest to becoming a surprisekisser was in Paris, atop the Eiffel Tower. Loneliness was surely to blame here, as I was living in a state of near nunnery among 40 girls and one man. The city of love was too much to take, and ten girls spent a good twenty minutes chickening out of the challenge to grab an attractive euroman and smooch him. I descended the tower with my dignity intact but my Italian grandchildren forever unborn. Would I change it if I could go back? Yeahhh… ok no way I’m a wuss.

In closing, I would like to point out that the soundtrack to this post, In My Place by Coldplay, is no coincidence. Wouldn't it be the perfect backdrop to a surprise kiss?? So epic. Just try it, I double dare you. Start the song over and imagine two hotties of your choice, standing face to face and slightly breathless. They stand for a minute, wordless, then one rushes up, facegrabs, and there you go. Slow motion is optional from here on out. Bet you’ve never experienced INTERACTIVE BLOGGING before! I guess sitting next to Lars is rubbing off on me.

On that note, I hope everyone knows I am not as obsessed with kissing as this post is making me seem. Yikes. Consider it more my expression of something I’ve secretly wanted but will NEVER in a million years do. We all have dreams right? Yours might be skydiving. Mine is s.k.ing. Anyway, if anyone has a story of a surprise kiss, whether a success or a fail, advice on how to pull one off, your favorite s.k., etc. I must hear!!!


brown eyed girl said...

Haha who hasn't daydreamed just a little bit (or a lotta bit) about a surprise kiss.

Maybe part of the attraction is that when a guy is the instigator, it just seems so confident and manly. He wasn't just waiting for the all the green lights to go on, he just goes for it.

Courtney said...

don't worry i found your blog and LOVE it. i can't wait until i am not vegan and can try the banana cream pudding at magnolia bakery with you!

Angie said...

You need to know that your blog is freaking hilarious. I love it. I just found it and it's awesome. So... thanks! :)

Brooke said...

a. we need to catch up, callllll me
b. I have a really funny s.k. story for you which includes me in vienna a couple years ago kissing a cute boy at the market who didn't speak a word of english...yeaaaaah.

Heather Woolley said...


I just found your blog through Andrea Fredrick's link. You are so funny. I loved your post. As for surprise kisses, I've been the kisser and the kissee. I think it was more fun to be the kisser because when I was the kissee, the surprise wasn't totally welcome--and I knew full well the surprise kiss as the kisser was wanted and welcomed so it was much more fun! But I have also done the "kiss a handsome european boy on the top of the eiffel tower!". Ok, so it was a peck on the cheek he gave me, but the other girls I was with planted one right on his lips. Guess I just didn't want to be "just another girl" for him! hahaha. It was fun and I'd never heard of it before, luckily the study abroad London gals with me knew the routine!

Amy Allen said...

As always, hilarious. And btw, the Italian s.k. isn't all it's cracked up to be - even at the Trevi Fountains.

Krista said...

So just yesterday my good friend informed me that she s.k.'d a guy she had been good friends with for a long time. It was in his car, she did it, he kissed her back (hard). The story does not have a happy ending for the two (an ensuing romance lasted only 24 hours) but she said it was the biggest rush she had ever experienced.

Katie Mellor said...

REBBIE! I always feel the urge to s.k. in new york! way too many hot guys...maybe some day. Your blog makes me laugh so hard.

bob said...

what a about this kind of surprise kiss huh??!!!



Just Another Girl said...

I was s.k.ed in Paris when I was 18. It was the night that France beat Portugal in the semi-finals in the 2006 world cup. We were at a French restaurant and the waiter and I kept locking eyes. I thought he was gorgeous. I, however, was being taken around Paris by my father's old friends, so I was in no place to do anything about our mutual attraction.

I had gone downstairs to use the toilet and when I came out of restroom he was waiting for me. In his thick French accent he told me that he thought I was so beautiful and begged me to meet him later that evening. I explained that I couldn't as I was spending the evening with my friends. He looked very sad. He gave me a piece of paper with his name (sofiane) and number and said, as he wrapped one arm around my back and his other hand around my neck, "then just one kiss" and he kissed me.
Makes for a great story.

So yes it does happen in real life.