Wednesday, 17 March 2010

unbelievable. UNBELIEVABLE!!

my friend just showed me this. it's the 'about me' section from this guy's facebook page who she served her mission with. i thought he was joking and really liked him...and then she told me he was serious. i am speechless.

My Name is Bradley Rutherford (name changed in case he tries to sue me). I Returned from Barcelona, Spain (also changed in case of legal ramifications) after serving a 2 year mission for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints in January 2010. Because such an esoteric and life altering change took place while I was out and about on what I consider to be a very meritorious mission, I apologize if I seem abstruse to those who have known me for years. When I first left for Ohio 2 years ago I left behind an ignominious and rancorous lifestyle. I wasnt what one would consifer "Stalwart." However, as many a missionary does, I "found myself" and learned that who I am and who I could be is far more important then who I was and used to be. I enjoy spontaneity. I live for adventures. Some might consider my style pretentious, I just simply enjoy having fun and doing things that are only dreamed of. I don't accept No as a possibility. If i want to do something i will make sure it is done. I enjoy a life of appreciated sophistication and class not a life boasting meretricious crassitude. I enjoy spending time on my Steinway and driving to secret places and exemplary eating establishments up in the mountains. I now, contrary to my past eccentricities, consider myself numinous. I love and try to live my religion regardless of all the disadvantageous and precarious positions i inadvertently find myself in. I am relaxed, patient, and a heavy-hearted romantic. I enjoy showing others how to have the night of their life without indulging in sordid and salacious entertainment. I love who I am, because I am learning more about who I am and to where I will be able to take myself. I plan on being successful and marketable and look forward to sharing a prominent future with those I love.

thesaurus.com anyone??

Sunday, 7 March 2010

sisterfriend

so sometimes when you date people there are expectations you will get to know their family. this can be an awkward situation for all involved, but i find it particularly disconcerting for one reason.

i do my best to find out as much as possible before the actual meeting takes place, but this phrase is especially comforting:
"it's weird but i look nothing like the rest of my siblings!!"

because who hasn't finally met the guy's mom, dad, aunts and uncles, all great people and then you meet his sister. who looks EXACTLY LIKE HIM! gahhhh. suddenly everything you thought you were attracted to makes you question your sexual orientation. not a fan.

it's not that i don't love meeting new girl friends. i just don't enjoy the confusion that comes when i'm looking into my lover's eyes and there she is. talk about an invasion of privacy.

i might be able to make an exception if it were him and her

but him and her...

wait i forget nikki is a woman. i'm still not convinced...?

anyway, i guess i should get over this little issue i have. especially after tonight's lecture from my father about how my expectations are too high. but is it that complicated? all i'm asking is for that one little sentence. i won't even ask for him to have a normal last name...